This Bites

Observations:
There was a time, not so long ago, when this puppy was sweet. She would lie in our laps, staring up at us adoringly until falling asleep. She would curl up next to us on the couch for hours. She would lick our faces and let us rub her belly.

And now, she just bites.

When we get home, she is excited to see us…then she bites. In the morning, I let her out of the crate…and she bites. When she rolls on her back and we rub her belly, she bites. She bites fingers, hands, wrists, and arms. She latches onto shirt sleeves, pant legs, pajama bottoms, the underside of the chair, the couch, the curtains, and the woodwork. Her jaws unhinge, then snap shut, clamping around objects much like a small, chocolate, furry alligator. All of this is great fun to her. To the rest of us…not so much. Even Traz seems to be running low on patience, opting to play with Sophie and Tank instead of walking around with a Labradorian pilot fish hanging from his neck.

This is not to say we do not love our little barracuda. She is still very cute and highly amusing, especially when she thunders across the room with a bone the size of her body wedged in her mouth. We keep expecting her to hit her growth spurt any day, as she is still only slightly larger than when we brought her home. Of course, since we see her every day, I’m sure she is larger than she appears, but we still wonder when our little girl is going to start growing. This is primarily for selfish reasons because we are tired of pulling her out from under the chair as if extracting a moray eel from its sandy burrow (…all the while being bitten).

All aquatic metaphors aside… Other than the biting, the only other frustration is the house-breaking (or lack thereof). Embry has apparently decided that Traz’s crate makes a better bathroom than outside. This morning, when I opened the door, she went halfway out, then spun around and ran into Traz’s crate, immediately depositing a large helping of chocolate soft-serve. After all, the outside is for playing; we shalt not soil our playground!

We also need to start limiting access to the water bowl. Originally, Embry was given water in her own little, glass dish. This worked for about three days, until Traz decided the little, glass dish should be picked up and carried. So, we began using a larger bowl. Traz decided the larger bowl was even better, as it held more water and made a bigger mess when picked up and carried. To solve this problem, we moved the giant, "community" water dish into the kitchen for all to partake. Embry loves this. In fact, she loves this every five minutes, whether she is thirsty or not. She loves sticking her nose in the water, then her paws in the water, then actually drinks every once in awhile. Then she pees. Wash, rinse, repeat. This ritual takes places approximately every five to six minutes, or whenever she is not biting.

Thankfully, the other dogs have reached the Peaceful Acceptance stage, so the baby gates are down. Darcy just ignores Embry, who ultimately gives up and tries one of the other dogs. Tank is fine, aside from the occasional growl when Embry has something he wants. Traz is a Godsend, suffering all of the teeth-induced bloodshed that would be directly solely at us if he weren’t around. Sophie continues to give looks of pure, unadulterated hate, but no longer tries to make puppy pâté.

As our fourth week with Embry comes to a close, we continue reflecting on all of the joyfulness and entertainment she has brought into our lives. We do this while counting the fresh scars and teeth marks on our various body parts. But, hey – she is cute!

Number of Days Without an Accident: Zero

Today, I'm Bleeding From: My forearm.

Number of Leaves Eaten Today: Two, plus several ounces of tree bark.


Current Interests:
I hate my collar. I was going along just fine before they stuck this thing around my neck. As hard as I try and as often as I scratch, I just can’t get rid of it. Plus, when somebody grabs me by the collar, I can’t reach them with my teeth, nor can I squirm away under the chair. I’m not at all happy that my parents are beginning to introduce rules and boundaries. This here puppy is a free spirit! I like my unregulated lifestyle!

I also really like teeth. Teeth can be used to chew holes in the side of the chair. And the couch. And the carpet. And towels. And rugs. And the little rubber stoppers on the sides of the baby gates. And the island in the kitchen. And toes (LOVE toes!). I like teeth. I think I shall use them even more often.

The Other Dogs are Currently:
Darcy............ *yawn*
Sophie..........."Just because it’s here doesn’t mean I’ll like it. Ever."
Tank Man......."Oops, I stepped on it. Oops, I stepped on it again. Oops…"
Traz.............."Dude, you ever heard of personal space?!"

Damnit!

Observations:

In a word: “Ouch!!!”

We’ve entered the dreaded biting phase of puppyhood, as our little Labrador/Badger/Rattlesnake/Velociraptor has adopted a taste for human flesh. I’m about ready to start walking around with a bone or a rope in my pocket so that as soon as she lunges and strikes at my hands, I can stuff a toy in her mouth. Gone already are the days of our sleepily sweet puppy, who would fall recline upside down in your lap while you rubbed her hairless, pink belly. Here instead is the meat tenderizer, the little chocolate puppy who prefers fingers and toes to Kongs and tennis balls.

This morning, for example, Embry was on the bed, seemingly charming and ready to snuggle and nap. She crawled up to me, tail wagging, almond-shaped eyes glistening in the early morning sunlight. But then, in the amount of time it took me to yawn and focus my sleep-deprived vision, Embry coiled and launched herself directly at my face. Luckily, my cat-like reflexes enabled me to engage the pillow shield and roll out of the line of fire. During the scolding that ensued, she managed to latch herself onto my thumb, leaving four distinct teeth-like indentations.

We had a similar incident the other morning when Embry discovered pinecones. While we were out in the yard (…at 4:30am…), she grabbed a small pinecone and began thundering across the yard. When I caught her and removed said pinecone from her tightly-clasped palate, she became visibly aggravated with me, juking left to right and growling with as much ferociousness as a 10-week-old Labrador can muster. When I chuckled at her supposed animosity and turned to walk back into the house, however, Embry latched herself onto the back of my leg and violently shook her almost 11 pounds in a furious rage. The result of her efforts was a small hole in the leg of my pajamas…and a time out in her crate.

On the other hand, we spent all weekend sans baby gates. Sophie has apparently come to terms with the puppy staying, so she has stopped willing it to be gone. I wouldn’t go so far as to say she “likes” Embry, but she has at least stopped trying to eat her. If she gets tired of the puppy, she walks away and jumps onto the couch…or, if we aren’t looking, onto the chair. The same goes for Darcy. As long as Embry keeps her distance and doesn’t bite Darcy’s tail, everyone exists within relatively peaceful acceptance. Not bad for only a few weeks. This is a difficult adjustment for older dogs and I’m thrilled with how they’ve come around.

Especially Darcy, whose vestibular disease made an unwelcome return on Thursday. It’s a scary thing to see her suddenly dizzy, stumbling, and seemingly incoherent. Quite literally, she is fine one minute, then awkwardly faltering the next. After spending the night at the vet, a shot of Prednisone, a dose of Meclizine, and a few rounds of Cerenia (the miracle anti-nausea drug for dogs), she is on the road to recovery. It usually takes one to two weeks to get back to “normal”, which is to say the dog learns how to adjust to the affliction. It’s a sober reminder that she is 15 years old.

But my money is still on her if you ever mess with her feet…

Number of Days Without an Accident: Zero

Today, I'm Bleeding From: My thumb and my wrist.

Number of Leaves Eaten Today: None, plus one pinecone.

Current Interests:
I’m not too thrilled about no longer getting lunch. Now, I apparently only get breakfast and dinner, which is somewhat uncool. These people have not yet learned that you don’t mess with a Labrador’s food! We like routine. We like large amounts of food. We like large amounts of food provided routinely, preferably with a large side order of more food. I like the fact that I can keep stuffing an impressive amount of food into my gullet. I’m sure this will come in handy some day when somebody forgets to close the pantry door.

I think I’ve finally figured out the Yellow Dog. As long as I keep at least two feet between us, she doesn’t growl and show me her giant teeth. Now that we are nearing the peaceful acceptance stage of our relationship, there are no baby gates, which leaves a longer runway for me to thunder through the downstairs. More importantly, the extra space gives me more variety in terms of places to pee…which I still like to do often.

I also really like teeth. Teeth can be used to chew on upholstery and table legs. And thumbs. And blankets. And the plastic stuff inside the dishwasher. And the metal pieces on the bottom of the refrigerator. And the side of the island in the kitchen. And toes (LOVE toes!). And pinecones. I like teeth. I think I shall use them even more often.

The Other Dogs are Currently:
Darcy............*mmm* “All this chicken makes it almost worth getting sick.”
Sophie..........."I’m going to barf a huge pile of crap on the floor.”
Tank Man.......*hehe* “Watch what it does when I growl at it…”
Traz.............."Dog Jail sucks."

Six More Weeks of Winter

Observations:
We thought yesterday was finally going to be the day that Sophie stopped hating the puppy. After we both got home from work, Sophie was in the kitchen, wagging her tail, acting atypically happy. When Embry got within a few feet of her, she did not growl or snarl. Instead, she dropped to the floor with her butt in the air, as if she was going to play. Much praising of the Yellow Dog ensued.

Unfortunately, it was short-lived. After a few minutes, Sophie lost interest and decided puppies are better for eating than for playing with. Oh, well…we’ll get there.

We’ve regressed a bit with the stairs, as Embry no longer seems interested in climbing up or down. I don’t want to force her, so I’m waiting until she is a bit bigger before we revisit the steps. Besides – it’s nice that we can put her on the deck without fear of her going anywhere…for now. Otherwise, she is still very confident, almost fearless. When the other dogs growl at her, she gets submissive and rolls onto her back, tongue flailing, but she does not run away and cower. When Traz and Tank thunder back and forth through the family room, she is right in the mix, weaving in and out of their legs. Makes us nervous because we think she is going to get trampled, but she is fairly nimble and very resilient.

Embry has only been scolded once over the past few days because of her biting, so I hope she is getting the hang of it. When we were sitting on the floor during one of our early morning play sessions, I saw her roll back on her haunches, then launch herself at me. Luckily, I saw it coming and was able to (mostly) dodge the exposed fangs of Demon Puppy, but she did knick my bottom lip. I grabbed her by the scruff, told her no, then put her in the crate. I’m sure she had no idea what she did wrong, as she just sat there with that innocently blank puppy look. I’m hoping it was only a one-time occurrence.

Number of Days Without an Accident: Zero *sigh*

Today, I'm Bleeding From: My forearm.

Number of Leaves Eaten Today: None.

Current Interests:
It was sunny and warmer the past few days. This morning, however, was extremely cold on my naughty bits! What gives?! No way was I going to squat on a semi-frozen, snow-dusted deck when I could just as easily pee on a nice warm carpet. It’s also easier just to go in Traz Dog’s crate and hose it down while he isn’t looking. Sure beats going out in the cold.

I think something is stalking me, but I can’t catch it. I’ll be sitting there minding my own business, when something under the blanket suddenly starts moving. I pounce on it and start digging frantically, but whatever it is disappears. After I sit and wait for a few minutes, it comes back and makes little scratching noises…so I pounce again, and again it goes away. I’ve even tried pulling the blankets back with my paws and my teeth, but there is never anything underneath. When I look up at my mom and dad, they act like they didn’t see a thing and just laugh at me. I don’t get it… What is this little creature that continues to taunt me? Why can’t I dig it out from underneath the blanket? Why does the Yellow Dog act like she likes me for a fleeting moment, only to turn around and try to eat me a second later? I’m trying very hard to like her.

I also really like teeth. Teeth can be used to chew on people’s chins. And fingers. And ears. And hair. And ankles. And forearms. And wrists. And feet. And toes (LOVE toes!). And little tumbleweeds of dog hair. I like teeth. I think I shall use them more often.

The Other Dogs are Currently:
Darcy............"Whatever…a dog is a dog. I know I’m still the favorite.”
Sophie..........."My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?"
Tank Man......."I’ll be in the dog bed if you need me.”
Traz.............."Now, you wait here while I get the food off the counter."

Urine Luck

Observations:
After decreasing the amount of water in which we soak Embry's food, the amount of peeing has decreased exponentially. In fact, today is officially the first day of ZERO accidents in the house! When I came downstairs at 3:00am, I did so to a dry, non poop-coated crate. I took her outside, at which point she promptly fired both barrels, then we celebrated with our typical morning routine: bone, rope, Kong...interspersed with biting and thundering wildly through the family room. (Note: Embry provides all of the afore-mentioned thundering. At that hour of the morning, I'm far too tired to participate in any ceremonious cannonades. My contribution is to lie on the floor with my eyes closed while she rumbles past, hopefully with a toy in her mouth and not dragging around a power cord.)

Today was the last day of her Clavamox. Next, we get to test our agility by attempting to obtain a urine sample so we can make sure the UTI is gone. Larger dogs are somewhat easy: walk up behind them with some form of urine-catching receptacle (e.g. bowl, saucer, measuring cup, Tupperware, or -- worst case -- your bare hands), ignore the curious, yet resentful glance out of the corner of their eye, wait for them to squat or hike...then swiftly, yet stealthily place the repository into the line of fire. Female puppies, on the other hand, provide only a one-inch clearance in which to place the pee-ferrying vessel. The odds of first-chance success are slim, but luckily one never has to wait long for the next performance.

And for those of you who have asked for an update on Traz...he is still in Dog Jail. Over the past two hours, he has retrieved the following from on or around the kitchen countertops: an empty, plastic water bottle; an oven mitt; one can of tomato soup (condensed); one spatula; a dish rag; a dish towel; the plastic shipping bag from my new running shoes (which arrived today); one of my Crocs; the remaining carcass of a previously-stuffed goose. As only one of the above-listed items is appropriate for retrieval, Mr. Alcatraz remains locked up when unsupervised.

In another, non Embry-related story... I couldn't figure out why the lick granuloma on Tank's leg will not heal. He had one on his other leg, but it healed quickly by using the bitter lime antiseptic spray. This sore, however, keeps hanging around. We've tried the usual spray as well as a topical lick guard (that smells strongly of cayenne pepper and garlic), but the spot won't fully heal. We also tried applying the topical, then bandaging the leg. The first time, Tank promptly unwrapped the bandage. The second time, Tank unwrapped the bandage...then ate it, thus destroying the evidence (though it re-appeared five days later in the corner of the bedroom at 2:00 in the morning).

Anyway, tonight I witnessed why this particular spot will not heal. While Tank was nested in the dog bed, I walked over and sprayed his leg several times with the bitter lime. After receiving a few minutes of praise and the obligatory cookie, Tank got up, walked over to the water dish, got a big mouthful of water...and dropped it down his leg, thus washing away all of the bitter lime. While I stood there in amused disbelief, he washed, rinsed, repeated several times, then trotted happily back to his bed. He then looked up at me with a coy grin on his face, and I swear I heard him think "What...? What are you lookin' at?"

Number of Days Without an Accident: ONE!!! (Hot damn!)

Today, I'm Bleeding From: My wrist

Number of Leaves Eaten Today: Two (...that I know of)

Current Interests:
I'm getting bigger! When I jump onto the baby gates, my paws now reach the top. When I get to be as big as Traz Dog, I'll jump over them and have free reign of the house. I've discovered that I can keep eating and my stomach will just expand to accommodate the amount of food. When I'm done, I look like a bloated, chocolate rectangle, but it's good to know I have such a capacity for consumption. That will come in handy when I figure out how to get into the magic fridge.

The dishwasher is also way cool! There are always some nibblies and pools of food-scented water within reach when the door is open. I tried chewing my way through the bottom, but Big Guy caught me and locked me in the other room. Just for that, I got him up at 4:00 the next morning and surprised him with not one, but TWO giant poops in my crate. Revenge is a dish best served room temperature and spread around as much as possible.

I also really like teeth. Teeth can be used to chew on the corner of the dishwasher. And the fridge. And the stove. And the closet door, behind which lies the boundless bounty of dog food. And the tray of my crate. And towels. And toes (LOVE toes!). And leaves (LOVE leaves!). And table legs. I like teeth. I think I shall use them more often.

The Other Dogs are Currently:
Darcy............"What's for dinner?"
Sophie..........."Stupid Puppy. THAT'S what is for dinner."
Tank Man......."It's not that bad...when it's tired."
Traz.............."Yeah? YOU try getting stuck in the room with it all the time."

Busy Weekend

Observations:
Our little badger has enjoyed a very busy weekend (which explains why she spent most of yesterday afternoon and today sleeping...not that I'm complaining). On Saturday, Embry made her first "official" trip to the vet and met Dr. Owens. After being passed around the office and repeatedly told how cute she is, Embry received her shots and a clean bill of health.

While she was there, she ate what was apparently her first dog biscuit. It didn't take her long to start crunching on it, but she did struggle a bit trying to eat such a crunchy treat with her puppy teeth. She only has two more days to go on the antibiotics, though she seems to really like the Pill Pockets. We smoosh them into mini meatballs and she chomps them down - a nice change from trying to trick her with peanut butter.

Yesterday, she met her cousin Brock...who is only three weeks older, but a good eight pounds heavier. It was a little like watching Rocky Marciano versus Sugar Ray Leonard. We've often wondered if dogs from the same breeder know "their own". Brock and Embry never hesitated; they immediately jumped into the fray as if they have known each other forever. After a few hours of rough-and-tumble, no-holds-barred, puppy bowling action, Embry slept quite well the rest of the evening.

I've never written so much about something peeing, but hopefully her bladder performances will cease to find their way into this blog. As the antibiotics work their magic on her UTI, and the fears over her having ectopic ureter are soaked into paper towels and discarded, we can focus on her newfound experiences rather than her execratory escapades. She is already having fewer accidents in the house, other than when she pees at night...and when she wanders into Traz's crate to pee there versus soiling her own. Unfortunately, Embry is still is doing the #2 step when she poops in her crate and dances in the moonlight, which I really hope she soon outgrows.

Number of Days Without an Accident: Zero

Today, I'm Bleeding From: My left thumb

Number of Leaves Eaten Today: Four

Current Interests:
My cousin Brock is pretty cool. Even though he is bigger than me, we took turns tackling each other and playing "Let's See Who Tastes Better". I hope I get to see him again when I'm a bit bigger. He looks like a little, stuffed polar bear. I'm not sure about the vet, but I don't mind getting handed around and fussed over amongst the vet techs. Let's see if they still do that after I gain another 50 pounds. It was fun seeing my aunt Julie and that Pug, too. It's a pretty cool place there, as long as they don't stick things up my butt.

I also really like teeth. Teeth can be used to chew on the railing of the deck. And the tarp covering the firewood. And the stuffed pig Aunt Jill brought over (...which now has a hole in its head). And the little broom used to sweep the fireplace. And drawer pulls. And Kleenex. And the base of the lamp. And socks. And drawstrings. And thumbs. I like teeth. I think I shall use them more often.

The Other Dogs are Currently:
Darcy............"You just stay on your side of the line."
Sophie........... *sigh* "I'll be out back in the mud until it's gone."
Tank Man......."Is it bigger yet? Let me know when it's bigger."
Traz.............."Hey, other dogs. Little help...please?!"

Two Week Notice

Observations:

Embry came home two weeks ago today. She already seems taller, though still small by "Labrador Standards". We're not worried, however. We've increased her food to 1/2 cup three times a day. No idea where she stuffs all of that food, but she certainly wolfs it down just as fast as her elders. Embry definitely likes to eat. Dog food, leaves, grass, sticks, mulch, furniture, small children...she has quite the voracious appetite. It's impressive, really, as are the ensuing belches. That's my little girl!

Today, she discovered she can squeeze under the deck. At first, we started to chase her, then realized it was too late; all we could do is wait for her to come back out, which she did after only a few minutes. No cause for alarm. She also likes to explore the vastness of the backyard, and run into chairs on the deck while attempting to navigate them. Coordination is a skill still to be learned.

Embry still pees more than anything I've ever seen, but that's puppy. The "leaking", on the other hand, seems to have stopped. She goes to the vet tomorrow, so I'm hopeful we can officially put to rest the idea of ectopic ureter.

She also needs to learn to stop launching at us like a rattlesnake. She sits down, makes eye contact, coils, then springs, with canine incisors exposed and seemingly glistening with puppy venom. She strikes with reckless abandon, latching onto your clothing with a vice-like grip and shaking her head ferociously, just as her ancestors felled the magnificent antelope on the vast plains of the Serengeti. All exaggeration aside, this is one habit that needs breaking immediately because she bites like an angry badger.

We also look forward to Embry meeting one of her cousins tomorrow. Brock is two weeks older than Embry, though considerably larger. Not to fear: our little girl is fearless and used to being knocked around by bigger dogs. It builds character! Brock is quite the handsome fellow and we are excited to see how they get along.

Another nice change is that Embry has all but stopped screaming at night in her crate. We moved her crate from one corner to another (in order to accommodate Traz's Dog Jail)...and apparently she likes her new corner better. She still loves to pee and poop in her crate, then jump around in it like Jennifer Grey in "Dirty Dancing", but she will grow out of that. We hope. I mean, Jennifer Grey was pretty hot in that movie...from what I remember after waking up...

Number of Days Without an Accident: Zero

Today, I'm Bleeding From: My right index finger.

Number of Leaves Eaten Today: Five

Current Interests:

Traz Dog is pretty cool. He is still the only dog who plays with me, but he lets me try to eat his face and hang from his collar. I guess as role models go, I can do a lot worse. I love how he gets things off the counters for me to chew on. Have to remember that one...

I also really like teeth. Teeth can be used to chew on zippers and shirt collars. And chins. And hair. And leaves (LOVE leaves). And the soles of shoes. And pillows. And the arm strap of laptop cases. And the new dog bed. And, oddly enough, just chewing on the flat wall provides some mind-numbing enjoyment, though not as much as the corners. And the fleshy part of necks. And wrists. And ankles. And what's left of my (now de-stuffed) goose. I like teeth. I think I shall use them more often.

The Other Dogs are Currently:

Darcy............*yawn* "So, when's dinner?"

Sophie..........."You are dead to me."

Tank Man......."Keep those teeth away from my ears and I think we'll be ok."

Traz.............."Me like puppy. Puppy taste gooood. Puppy tastes of food bits."

Pardon the Interruption

We interrupt this program for a word about one of the "other" dogs...

For those of you wondering what happens to a dog when you combine:

a. Intelligence

b. Problem-solving abilities

c. Boredom

...the answer is "nothing good".

After enjoying over a month of crateless freedom, Mr. Alcatraz finds himself once again behind bars. And so our story begins on the morning of Monday, February 9th...

An ordinary morning by our standards, all of the dogs were fed, released into the yard, then brought back into the house as I left for work. Sometime during the few minutes they came back in the house and Cindy came downstairs, Traz managed to remove the jar of peanut butter from the countertop. From there, he managed to unscrew the lid of said peanut butter jar. Alas, the fruits of his labors went unrealized, as Tank stole the open jar from Traz. When Cindy arrived in the kitchen, Tank was nestled in the dog bed, his snout shoved as far as it could go into the jar. Inside the jar was a large, perfectly uniform swirl, the result of Tank's tongue-aided churning. There is barely a mark on the outside of the jar.

Traz has always liked "soft things" (towels, oven mitts, dish rags, washcloths, etc.) and has a penchant for bringing them to us...or walking idly past so we know he has them. Yesterday, Cindy came home at lunch to find all of the throw rugs piled in the dog bed. She picked up the rugs, put them on the counter in the laundry room, then went back to work. By the time I got home, all of the throw rugs were once again piled on the dog bed. Along with the rugs, however, were two dress shirts. Somehow, Traz managed to stand on his hind legs, balance himself on the side of the tall laundry basket, then reach down into the basket and pull out the shirts...not once, but twice. Mind you, he never damages the items, but rather drags them back to his dog bed burrow.

That same evening, while I was upstairs for no longer than two minutes, Traz again managed to reach onto the kitchen counter. This time, with no peanut butter jar in residence, he stretched even further and grabbed the plastic container full of Embry's food. When I came back downstairs, Tank was once again settled in the dog bed, wrapped protectively around the (thankfully, still-sealed) Tupperware.

And I'm not even going to mention the unraveling of the Labrador pillow or the countless times he has wandered off with my shoes.

Luckily, he is not destructive. We are quick enough and dog-savvy enough to catch him before he crushes anything with his giant canines. But for now, after enjoying a few weeks of unrestricted liberation, Mr. Traz finds himself incarcerated in Dog Jail when he can not be supervised.

We now return you to your regularly-scheduled blogging, already in progess.

Milestone

Last night was a major milestone. Embry was asleep on the floor after bouncing around like a crazy dog for the better part of 45 minutes. (Aside: One thing we've always noticed about Labradors: when the seasons turn from Winter to Spring, then Summer to Fall, the energy level of our Labs goes through the roof. They went absolutely crazy last night.) When I scooped Embry up to put her in the crate, her tail was soaked with urine. Depression ensued...

I somewhat wish our vet had never put the "ectopic ureter" idea into our heads. Now, every time Embry pees, I think, "Did she really need to go, or was that just the ectopic ureter? Did she pee in her sleep because the UTI resulted in a weakened bladder, or is it because of a ectopic ureter? Did she pee six times in a twenty-minute span because of a UTI, or is it ectopic ureter? Did the interest rate go up on my credit card because of the economy, or because of ectopic ureter?" It's just stuck in my head: ectopic ureter ectopic ureter ectopic ureter ectopic ureter

Anyway, back to the milestone...and why I think it's not ectopic ureter. As is typically the case, I let Embry out at midnight for a stroll on the deck. She peed, ate a leaf, chewed on a stick, then went back inside. We tugged on a rope, chewed on a bone, then I took her back outside after about twenty minutes, and she peed again. Back into the crate and I went back to bed. At 2:30am, the screaming began again, so I went back downstairs and let her out again, at which point she immediately peed on the deck. When I grabbed the paper towels to clean up her crate, I noticed -- much to my surprise -- the crate was dry.

I'm still pinching myself to make sure I didn't dream it, but from what I can remember, there was no pee in the crate. Of course, when I let her back out at 4:15am, she had peed on the mat, but still...the crate was dry at 2:30am. It's an overwhelming sense of relief, as if she did have ectopic ureter, the crate would not have been dry (...in theory).

Embry still has another week to go on the Clavamox, then we start house-training in earnest. Our friend Jill reminded me to start using a bell tied to the doorknob. That way, we can teach Embry to ring the bell when she needs to do out. The rule is to take them out every time they ring the bell, then reward them ONLY when they actually do business.

But I'm getting ahead of myself...

Number of Days Without an Accident: Zero

Today, I'm Bleeding From: The back of my right ankle.

Current Interests:
I'm digging this warmer weather! Yesterday, I took a long stroll around the entire back yard. It's a wet, soggy mess right now, and I can't say I enjoyed splashing through the puddles, but it's a big place with lots of interesting smells. I'm also not crazy about the steps. I can go up them fairly well, but prefer to just jump off the deck and into the yard instead of walking down the steps. Of course, being carried is still my preferred method of transport.

I also really like teeth. Teeth can be used to chew on shirt sleeves and buttons. And the corner of the couch. And the corner of the chair. And the corner of the hearth. And the table in the corner. And any corner of the Traz Dog. And the little girls who live next door. I like teeth. I think I shall use them more often.

The Other Dogs are Currently:
Darcy............*sigh* "Why can't I be enough dog for you?"
Sophie..........."See what big teeth I have...the better to eat you with!"
Tank Man......."I like it better when it's asleep and not charging at me."
Traz.............."You realize how much you owe me, right?"

Corgiriffic!

Observations:
Embry is a true Labrador. In true Labradorian fashion, she has decided she does not like taking pills. At first, we tossed her Clavamox in with her food and she gulped it down without a thought. By the end of day two, however, we noticed the pill sitting in the bottom of her empty food dish. So, I started hand-feeding her some food with the pill strategically hidden in the kibble. That worked...twice. Next, we moved to peanut butter. She is now licking off the peanut butter and spitting out the pill. We refuse to be out-witted by an 8-week-old puppy.

We have no idea if the peeing is less, though she seems to be doing better peeing in fewer, but longer bursts. It all depends on how excited she gets and how long its been since she last went outside. Oddly enough, she seems to pee more inside than outside. Wonderful...

Embry is at least an inch taller than she was a week ago, and I'm guessing a pound heavier. She goes to the vet this weekend for her shots. And we need to take care of her AKC registration before Connie scolds us.

Number of Days Without an Accident: Zero

Today, I'm Bleeding From: The back of my ankle.

Current Interests:
Today was a big day. Not only did I meet Jack -- the grouchy Collie mix next door -- I met Oliver - Amy and Phil's Corgi. He wasn't quite sure what to do with me at first, but started playing soon enough. He is a funny little dog and I like him.

I also really like teeth. Teeth can be used to chew on doorstops and hinges. And toestrip. And corner tiles. And landscaping pavers. And mulch (LOVE mulch!). And bricks. And wrought iron table legs. And my tail, which I've recently discovered, but have a hard time reaching. I like teeth. I think I shall use them more often.

The Other Dogs are Currently:
Darcy............"I'm fine being in the same room, as long as I'm on the couch."
Sophie...........". . . . . ."
Tank Man......."If I'm really still, maybe it won't see me."
Traz.............."Thanks for the puppy. She is tasty!"

Badger Badger Badger Badger

Observations:
We've reached the end of Week One and everybody is still intact...though the carpet needs a good scrubbing. Embry seems to be peeing less frequently and in bigger amounts, which is progress. This morning, after letting her out at 4:00, she was in her crate for another four hours and did not wet her bed. While it might not seem like much to the casual observer, that is the first time she did not pee in her crate while asleep. If I was able to do a cartwheel, I might consider doing one!

Last night, Darcy lost her patience and snapped at Embry. We let the dogs in, Embry charged...and we weren't fast enough to grab her before she darted underneath Traz and latched onto Darcy's tail. Naturally, Darcy spun around and bit Embry. No major damage - just a lot of howling from a very scared puppy. One must learn to respect their elders.

As is the case with all of our dogs, Embry already has several nicknames: Em, Emmy, Monkey, Chocolate Monkey, Badger, Baby Badger, Wolverine, Eel, Cat Dog, Pee Pot, etc... You can not be a dog in our house without a variety of pet names. So far, she responds to none of them.

Unlike when we had Kelsey at this age, we survived the first week without any damage to furniture, carpets, baseboard, etc. Other than crawling under the chairs and chewing off the "Do Not Remove" tags, and gnawing the corners of the toy basket, everything is in its place and intact.

For now...

Number of Days Without an Accident: Zero

Today, I'm Bleeding From: My left toe.

Current Interests:
Toes are yummy. I don't know why it took me so long to discover them, but they are my new favorite chew toy. They fit quite nicely between my baby canine teeth, and come in a variety of tastes and sizes.

The yellow dog still hates me, but will come closer. I've tried pouring on the charm and being submissive, but it isn't working. Tank Dog is slowly coming around and has poked me with his nose a few times. The little Darcy Dog tried to eat my face last night. Bitch... Traz Dog is still my favorite. He gnaws on me and doesn't seem to mind when I hang from the side of his face. I like him.

I also really like teeth. Now that I've discovered what lies beneath the snow, teeth can be used to chew grass and pull the leaves off dead plants. Teeth can also be used to chew on pine needles. And mulch. And bricks. And shoelaces. And the underside of the door. And lawn ornaments (I like the ceramic hippo because it is about my size). I like teeth. I think I shall use them more often.

The Other Dogs are Currently:
Darcy............"See? Bite my tail, I bite your face off. Quid pro quo."
Sophie..........."I'm not saying another word until you get rid of it."
Tank Man......."It's cute when it sleeps, but it has sharp teeth."
Traz..............*mmm* "Me like the taste of puppy..."

Day Six

Observations:
Embry discovered a lovely, aromatic trick this evening. While I was feeding the other dogs, she unleashed a massive poop directly on top of the register. And since the heat had been running, the register was nice and warm...and the smell quickly circulated around the house. I'll have to remember that one if I happen to lose my job.

Embry is also quite the explorer. Not surprisingly, she likes to go into and behind things, such as the chairs and the couch. Tonight, she discovered she can squeeze behind the entertainment center, a situation I quickly rectified. But I love watching her approach and try to comprehend new things. She is very confident and curious. Still pees unlike anything I've ever seen, but we expected that. The ShamWows are coming in handy. Gotta' hand it to those Germans...

So far, my favorite thing is how she wraps herself around my feet and goes to sleep. She is not much of a kisser, other than when you first take her out of the crate, though the licking quickly turns to biting. But when she is tired, she is a very snuggly dog, which helps fill some of the void left by Kelsey. But more than anything, I like how much personality she has already, and how much she likes interacting with us. All of this is right out of the box; it's just who she is. Our job is easy - we just have to encourage the behavior.

The introduction to the other dogs is going very slowly. Embry and Traz are wonderful together, thankfully. Tank is still hesitant, but he is coming around. Darcy is being tolerant, but we are keeping them separated because Embry keeps trying to latch onto Darcy's tail...and Darcy will spin around and bite. Sophie is the one that disappoints us. If Embry comes within two feet of her, Sophie snarls and tries to chomp her. It's not a warning growl; she just snaps and launches herself at the puppy. So, they stay apart for now. I know it will just take time for everybody to adjust. We'll just wait and see.

Now that Embry is not barking (quite) as much in her crate, her bark is almost back to normal. Thankfully, she now sounds more like a puppy and less like a howler monkey.

Number of Days Without an Accident: Zero

Today, I'm Bleeding From: My left ankle.

Current Interests:
Traz Dog and I discovered a new game tonight. I charge and bounce toward him...then just as I close, he whacks me with his nose and I go rolling across the floor like a furry, brown tumbleweed. I'm not sure if it is fun, exactly, but at least he is not trying to eat me like the yellow dog is. I did get my payback when the Traz Dog fell asleep and I took a flying, cannonball leap onto his exposed belly. It was totally worth the ensuing wipe-out.

I also really like teeth. Teeth can be used to latch onto one side of a baseball cap after the Traz Dog pulls it off the counter. Teeth can also be used to carve my initials into the side of the wooden coffee table. And the underside of the chair. And the baby gates. And the side of my crate. And the kitchen island. And pants legs. And, every once in awhile, a Nylabone or a tennis ball. I like teeth. I think I shall use them more often.

The Other Dogs are Currently:
Darcy............"Oh, no no no...there will be NO biting of my tail."
Sophie..........."You're not listening. It needs to go away. Now."
Tank Man......."Why does it smell like pee?"
Traz.............."I think I now have a partner in crime. Excellent!"

Wait and See

Observations:
Two words we've become accustomed to over the past few months: "wait and see". The latest involves Embry, as she made her first trip to the vet today. We all know that puppies pee. A lot. Approximately every 2,726 steps (...give or take). But they typically don't leak urine at any age. If they do, it is typically a sign of something more serious, such as ectopic ureter. I'd never heard of that either, until the vet mentioned it last night.

Embry does not seem to leak urine constantly, nor does she have a rash on her stomach or back legs, but she does lick herself often and seems to pee when she falls asleep on one of our laps. After a urinalysis today at the vet, she tested positive for a Urinary Tract Infection (UTI) and is now on antibiotics. Hopefully, that is the problem. I'm really hoping it is just a combination of young bladder and UTI. As it is with most things, however, we will not know for some time. Clavamox for two weeks, followed by her first "real" checkup and shots at the vet. If it is ectopic ureter, it's surgery. Very expensive surgery. And if not, we rejoice and be thankful. Our vet is spectacular and we're on top of things. So for the moment, we wait and see.

Granted, the rational side of me is saying this is nothing...just a UTI...nothing to be worried about. Kelsey had the same thing around the same age. We talk to Embry's breeder almost daily and she says it is a UTI...and nobody knows her dogs better than her. Chances are, I'm being hypochondriatic (triple word score!!!) and this will all blow over in a few weeks. We are both still on high alert after losing two dogs in five weeks. Any time one of our dogs sneezes funny or vomits, we look at them and think, "Was that a normal noise? Did they just eat something in the yard? Was that a typical projectile vomit, or was it a few inches further than usual?" It is just a phase. Once I get an actual night's sleep (more than four hours) and things calm down at work, I'll snap out of it. But for now, we wait and see.

Number of Days Without an Accident: Zero

Today, I'm Bleeding From: The side of my hand.

Current Interests:
This whole snow thing sucks. Actually, I don't mind the snow so much, but the ice is freakin' cold on my naughty bits. The cold outside is not worth the fun of using my teeth on sticks and things. I don't understand why the yellow dog hates me. She is the only dog in the house that tries to bite me. What did I ever do to her? Is it because I'm so pretty? On the other hand, I really like this Traz dog. He plays with me and we tug on a stuffed goose. I'm not too crazy about him smooshing me with his giantness, but he lets me hang from his collar and get swung around.

I also really like teeth. Teeth can be used for latching onto and poking tiny holes in Crocs...which are my chew toy of choice. As well as the basket in the corner. And furniture tags. And electrical cords. And the door threshold. And curtains. And the carpet. I like teeth. I think I shall use them more often.

The Other Dogs are Currently:
Darcy............*yawn* "Ok, I get it. It's a puppy. Can I sit on the couch?"
Sophie..........."Why is it still here? Do I need to crap on your bed?"
Tank Man......."Dude, it has teeth. Why aren't you afraid of it?!"
Traz.............."Watch this - I saw it on Tom & Jerry once..."

Leaves of Grass

Observations:
With all of the snow we've had, it occurred to us that Embry has never seen grass. That changed yesterday, as the snow melted enough to uncover some grassy areas in the yard. Embry promptly began bouncing around and eating the grass, apparently much preferring that surface to the ice and snow. She also found some dried-up leaves on the deck, which she promptly attacked with reckless abandon.

This morning, we tackled the BIG steps in front of the house. At first, Embry tried unsuccessfully to climb her way up the concrete steps. She then took a running leap and got three of her legs onto the step before pulling up the last one. Lots of praise ensued. She is turning out to be quite the fearless little problem-solver. Of course, she does all of this with lots of whining and whimpering, as if everything in her life is a tremendous struggle.

In fact, Cindy just called to tell me that Embry "broke her barker". As this was the first day of her being in her crate for several hours, she apparently barked to the point where she now sounds like a frog. She is a very vocal little dog, as was her Aunt.

I'm trying very hard not to compare Embry to Kelsey, but they have a number of similarities (which I expected, having the same mother and father). Their temperaments are similar, though Embry is more fearless than Kelsey was at this age, and Kelsey had a higher energy level. I'm looking forward to seeing how Embry changes over the years...

Number of Days Without an Accident: Zero

Today, I'm Bleeding From: My other thumb.

Current Interests:
Have I mentioned that I do not like my crate? You can put as many toys as you want in this thing and make it as much like a den as you can...but I promise I will bark just as much and just as loudly when you lock me in it. Think you're going to watch TV? Think again. I also like the big, black dog. He lets me bite it and hang from its collar. I wish he'd stop thumping me with his giant paws, but I'm getting better at dodging them. I also really like teeth. Teeth can now be used for latching onto fingers and articles of clothing. Teeth can also be used to turn big leaves into lots of little leaf-like particulates, as well as stripping the bark from sticks in the yard. I like teeth. I think I shall use them more often.

The Other Dogs are Currently:
Darcy............"See? I told you. That was just a warning shot across your brow."
Sophie..........."Is it gone yet? No?! I'll be in the other room until you get rid of it."
Tank Man......."I just don't get it. Why does it keep bouncing at me?!"
Traz.............."Don't worry, I won't break it. It's pretty resilient."

Paper Mache

Observations:
Today, we met Mrs. Hair Dryer. While Cindy was drying her hair, we took Embry upstairs. The verdict: little to no response. She recognized there was a loud noise and was a little hesitant, then she went back to exploring the bathroom. On the other hand, she still hates her crate. I put her in at 9:05am. She stopped screaming and finally fell sleep at 10:20am. At 10:40am, she awoke and started screaming again until I let her out at 11:45am. She waddled out of the crate, peed, then crawled under the chair and went to sleep.

We've started mixing in her new food, Chicken Soup for the Puppy Lover's Soul with her Eukanuba. At first, I was skeptical because with a name like that, it sounds like some stupid, designer dog food. But when I looked up the ingredients on Dog Food Analysis, turns out it is a 4-star, high protein/low by-product food. Personally, I have nothing against Eukanuba, but for $8 more, we get a higher-calibre food. We really wanted Innova Puppy, but couldn't justify the price tag, as Innova has raised their prices yet again. When we first switched the dogs to Innova two years ago, it was $39.99/bag. Now, it is $54.99/bag.

Number of Days Without an Accident: Zero

Today, I'm Bleeding From: My thumb.

Current Interests:
I like paper. Last night, I discovered the magazines on the bookshelf. Teeth can now be used for turning large pieces of paper into smaller particles. I like teeth. I also like sticks. Oddly enough, teeth can also be used to turn large sticks into smaller stick pieces. I like teeth. I think I shall use them more often.

The Other Dogs are Currently:
Darcy............"If it charges me again, I'm going to eat it."
Sophie..........."I am not at all happy. Send it back...now. Seriously."
Tank Man......."Yeah...umm...I'll stay in the other room, thanks."
Traz.............."Awesome! Someone to tug with!"

Baby Wolverine

Observations:
Embry is a confident little badger. Surprisingly fearless, she didn't bolt and cower as I expected when I started the vacuum. Instead, she cautiously walked toward it and was very curious as to what it was doing. She is (finally) interested in going outside, as the weather was close to 50-degrees today. I know it is too good to be true, but she scratched at the door and barked before turning around and peeing on the carpet. The first time, I figured it was coincidental. The second time, I was cautiously optimistic. The third time, I said, "Hmmm... Well, I'll keep my fingers crossed."

Number of Days Without an Accident: Zero

Today, I'm Bleeding From: Between my fingers.

Current Interests:
I have teeth. Teeth can be used for a variety of things, such as making my food into smaller particles for easier consumption, holding my bones and my rope, latching onto mommy and daddy's clothes, and drawing blood from body parts. I like teeth. I think I shall use them more often. I'm also enjoying this whole digging thing. Next to biting and peeing, I think it's my favorite activity, though this cold, white stuff outside shows promise. In fact, I think I'm going to...oh, wait...there's a...*peeeeeee*... What was I thinking again? Hey - what's that over there? Whatever it is, I think it should go into my mouth.

The Other Dogs are Currently:
Darcy............*sigh*
Sophie..........."Puppy? What puppy? I refuse to accept its existence."
Tank Man......."Umm...ok. What is this thing supposed to be again?!"
Traz.............."Cool! If I hit it with my paws, I can make it squeak!"